Whitney Houston, and NYU Hospital

Whitney Houston reportedly got sole custody of her daughter Bobbi Christina yesterday in court, when her soon-to-be ex Bobby Brown didn't even show up for the hearing. WTF?! Is this a scary story, the lesser of two evils?

The same day this was happening, Ingrid and I were at NYU's Tisch Hospital, where we are scheduled to deliver Tiny. We were getting a tour of the OB ward there. We saw the rooms where you deliver--pretty medical, pretty basic, pretty much what I expected. We were on this tour with about eight other couples. The nurse on duty who gave the tour was this funny middle-aged woman who made jokes throughout but was pretty straightforward and seemed like a person you'd like to have with you during labor, if you were to be assigned a stranger. There was one room where you deliver, with a small hospital bed, next to an area with a fetal monitor, and looked like a standard, if a bit small, hospital room. We learned you can bring in ipods and DVDs, but no radio or stereo setup that everyone can hear. They recommended you bring two nightgowns that you don't mind getting bloody and shitty, a hairband, chap stick, and cotton socks. The nurse said you can bring in a birthing ball but it must be deflated, so you'd have to bring the air pump too! (Tita, can we borrow the pump for the bike tires for a few months?) She said if you don't get the epidural you can walk around, but she said you shouldn't anticipate doing laps or anything--that you may want to walk from the bed to the side chair, etc.

After you give birth, they take the baby away from you for about five minutes, and put her on this little warming table right next to your bed (it reminded me of Tita's warming drawer at the shore house kitchen), and do her Apgar tests--those basic tests that judge her alertness, stimulation level, etc. And then they put her right on your breast, and you get to hang for a couple hours. Then they take her upstairs to get examined by a pediatrician and have her hearing tested and reflexes and stuff. That takes a couple hours, then you get to hang out for the next day or two, depending on when you deliver and when they need the rooms and stuff, I guess.

One of the women in our group, you could tell, was kind of like me--wanted less medical intervention than the standard, but had still agreed to deliver in the hospital. She had about a zillion questions, ranging from "do you have to do TK thing," to "do they have to take the baby away from you to do the tests," to "do they have to bathe the baby right after she's born?" The nurse was kind of like, "Um, I suppose," but let's just say that the NYU staff was very medicalized, and not interested in alternative therapies. Not that they were forbidding you from doing stuff that was more alternative, but they were kind of like, "We do what's right for the baby, and the baby determines everything about your labor." It was interesting; basically she was saying that the baby, even not yet born, totally determines your labor experience--her position, how fast she moves, etc.

After you give birth, they take you up to "recovery," where you can get a semi-private or a private room, and you rest and hang there, and practice breastfeeding, for between 24 and 48 hours if you do a vaginal delivery, 72 hours if you do a Caesarian.

We left the hospital more educated, which is good. It took about 20 minutes to walk there. I told everyone at our first shower that I was planning on walking to the hospital if I go into labor at work. They were like, "UH uh. We'll give you cab fare." But I was saying that movement is encouraged, and I hope to be still walking, but I guess we'll see...

Shoutout to Duffy, who is now about 14 weeks, I am guessing? Hope you are feeling well, and thanks so much for reading.

A nice woman found a seat for me on the crowded subway tonight, and said, "It is pretty disgusting that men won't get up for you. Stick your belly in their face." Do men not give a shit about women who are tired and off-balance?