Meeting Great Grandma and Grandpa

We drove up to Orange County to meet my maternal grandparents and my aunts and uncles who live up there. They all loved Clyde. My grandma held her, and kept saying in Vietnamese, "She's smiling, she's smiling." My grandpa, whose health is fragile, didn't hold her but came into the bedroom where I was changing her and sat down on the bed and just watched her for about 15 minutes. It was quite beautiful! All of her great aunties and uncles also held her, as did my cousin Dao, who is my same age (36) and seems to be ready for a baby. Fred says she'd better "get on the stick."

It has been so nice to have my mom and Fred around so much during this time, to help and to really get to know Clyde in the early months. It's been such a blessing, and my mom has been so in love with Clyde. It's really been a joy to watch, since I don't get to see her with babies very often. This is what she's been waiting for, for years. I only wish Mama Ingy could have been here to see Clyde meet her great grandparents.

T-minus-8 days that I go back to work. Very much not looking forward. But have bought some good fall clothes, so I'm ready, at least logistically!

Clyde and Delilah

We had a playdate yesterday with my friend Shana from high school and her daughter Delilah, 5 months. It was amazing! Clyde looked over at Delilah, who is two months older, and Delilah was kicking at this toy, and then Clyde started kicking. Shana put a toy in front of Clyde, and Clyde started grabbing and holding it, and seemed SO happy yesterday. Shana said sometimes kids look at older kids and try to reach for the milestones that those kids are doing, and Clyde really seemed to! It was a great day yesterday. She was so happy and stimulated and loves her new BFF, Delilah!

Clyde's First Flight

We flew across the country this week, to visit Grandma Van and Grandpa Fred and Clyde's great grandparents and all of her aunties and uncles in Orange County, CA. The trip has been a raging success so far!

First, I figured out how to hook a carseat into a taxi without the car seat base. Easy peasy. Then, we did curbside check of my bag, and I brought the stroller attachment to the seat, which worked fine in the airport. I got mysteriously upgraded to first class. Amazing! There were all of these older men in first class, all looking like, "Don't sit next to me!" But the man who was next to me was very nice and even offered to hold Clyde while I ate (there is actually food in first class, and it's not bad! And unlimited wine!). She was an angel. She cried for, like, 5 minutes and that's all. She was alert for about an hour or two of the flight and we talked and read and played with a toy. The flight attendants took turns holding her while I ate, and they seemed very happy to do it.

On the connecting flight, I had to sit in icky coach, but it worked out OK. The man next to me was very nice and even held Clyde while she cried for a few minutes. It was not too bad. I checked the stroller at the gate and it was waiting for us when we got off the plane. So, traveling with an infant, the verdict is: NOT SO BAD! The only hard part really was going through security, I had to take apart the stroller and put it through the xray machine and carry Clyde through by hand. And on the flight, I had her in her Ergo carrier so my hands were kind of free.

When we got home, her sleep schedule was kind of screwy so she woke up twice in the night but she was mostly fine! Hooray!

Reading is Fundamental!

Our nanny, Clare, started last week. I have some trouble with effective management, and this is a new employee situation that I struggle with what the dynamic should be like. I mentioned to her that I want her to read to Clyde, and showed her the books. A couple of days passed with no reading (I've been here observing them, but kind of from a distance, and leaving for a few hours at a time), and I was feeling bummed and didn't know how to say, "You MUST read to her," without sounding like a dictator, and I do have trouble with direct communication, and sugar coating things.

After discussing with Ingrid, this morning, I said to Clare, "I know I said this before, but it bears repeating because it's so important to us. We want Clyde to be a good reader and to love reading, so I want you to try to read her at least a book a day." (Keep in mind her books take about 45 seconds to read.) "And I need to know you are doing this when I'm not here, so I'd like you to try to read to her today and tomorrow while I'm here so I can visualize you doing it and not have to worry about it."

This afternoon, she read her two books and is down on the floor, and Clyde is smiling a ton, in response.

For what it's worth...

Clyde Separation Anxiety

So Clare, the nanny, started part time yesterday. So far, so good. She came for a few hours yesterday morning, until about 1, and it worked out OK. After she left, I tried to get Clyde to sleep in her crib--which she has been avoiding, as it is too big or uncomfortable or scary or something--and finally, she took a FOUR-HOUR nap in her crib. I worried she wouldn't sleep at night then, but she did, fine. We watched Carnal Knowledge, a great old Mike Nichols movie with classic Jack Nicholson and amazing Candice Bergen and Ann-Margret, and Clyde fell asleep partway through that, and only woke up once to feed before 6 am.

Today Clare came and I went to the gym. First spin class since delivery, and it was really good. It felt good to finally have a strenuous workout (this was after doing a half hour of Namaste yoga on Fit TV with Clyde--I put her on a blanket near my yoga mat and I kiss her and do poses over the top of her and talk to her throughout).

When I got back, Clare wanted to take Clyde for a walk in her stroller, to check out where the nearby parks are in the area. In my head, I was like, "That's what I do! Not someone else!" She said they'd be gone about an hour. After that hour, I started looking out the window every 2 minutes. I started getting anxious. I wondered if I should call and check in on them but I want to exhibit trust in Clare and let them have some independent time to get to know each other. So I didn't call. After about an hour and a half, I started getting nervous and finally, Clare called me. They were at a park a few blocks away, and under a tree it was breezy and Clyde was napping. Clare said they wanted to stay out just a bit longer and I said fine.

But I missed Clyde. Bad. So I walked over to the park. Not to check on Clare but to visit Clyde and make sure they were doing OK. I was getting so sad and anxious. But didn't want to seem controlling or panicky. I got to the park, and they were fine, looking very peaceful, under a tree, and Clyde was sleeping, Clare, watching the birds.

I think the nanny will be loving and good with Clyde. But still, it doesn't make it any easier. Finally, I mopped the floors to keep my mind off my anxiety.

New Mommies Group

I went to a new mommies group in Park Slope, that Ingrid found for us online. I've met two women whom I really like, Laura, who is a mother of three (a 4 and 2-y.o. and now newborn Naomi, Clyde's friend). Ing and I couldn't figure out why Laura would be at a new moms group if she already knows how to be a mom, x 3. So I flat-out asked her, and she said she likes meeting new moms with kids the same age as her kids, and that all her friends with newborns had boys and she wants some girl babies to get to know Naomi. Cute!

Then there's Jessica from Entertainment Weekly, a TV writer and humorist/personality at the mag. I like her the most. I've decided she's going to be my new best friend. She invited Ingrid, Clyde and me over to watch DVDs of the fall pilots at her apartment. Holla! I am excited to be making new mom friends who live in the neighborhood, and who get free DVDs!

We hired a nanny. I am sad about having to start training her, as it means less time with just Liz and Clyde alone together. But I feel good about the nanny.

I saw my OB for my follow-up visit, and everything is in order, and my vagina is back to its normal self again. I guess. Who would know??? The doc says usually women don't start trying to get pregnant again until they start menstruating regularly again, and that doesn't usually happen until you stop breastfeeding. So we'll see what happens in the next few months, in re: # 2!

SuperOva is trying to get back to blogging...

Was talking to my friend (Uncle) Nick this weekend, and he encouraged me to start blogging again. I told him I've been hesitant because I don't want to do just a baby book online, and that I'm not sure how to get back to blogging in ways that are meaningful for me, without being like, "Clyde smiled today. Clyde pooped again. Clyde is crying."

So I'm just jumping in, writing about stuff that's on my mind, as a new parent.

I was at Bloomingdale's the other day and a middle-aged woman came up and was ogling Clyde. She looked closely at her, then closely at me, then back at Clyde.

"She looks like her father," she said.

Me: "Something like that."

Damn it! Where was my sense of wit? I should have said, "Actually, she looks like her other mommy. Or at least that's what we asked for at the sperm bank."